Words, Words, Words

“Be careful with words because once they are said, they can only be forgiven not forgotten”

Actions speak louder than words….but words are my love language.  Words can send me to the moon or make me feel trampled over.  Words can be an affirmation; a rejection, they can manifest into self-confidence or even self-doubt.  Be mindful of what you say to people.  We are taught to not let words get to us.  “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me”  How many times do we have to say that for it to be true? Although we’ve become masters at hiding that pain, words still hurt.  Today, I want you to reflect on some things.  How do you use your words? How do you receive words? And how do others receive your words?

How do you use your words?  Do you say, “hand me that” or do you ask, “Can you please hand me that?” Do you use kind words like "please" and "thank you" or are you more inclined to make statements allowing others to perceive your mood based on your tone?  Next time you talk to someone, or need something from someone; think about the way in which you communicate that.  Do you send people a quick text when you need something or do you take the time to say hello first.  We are not always mindful of the things we say because that’s just how we are, right? But how often do you put yourself in their shoes?

How do you receive words?  Sweet nothings are the best aren't they? It’s like a soft tickle on the back of your neck.  You can’t help but smile.  But what about when people don’t tell you what you want to hear.  Do you remember how if feels? Or do you just block it out? Or… do you reply so quickly that you did not even consider how those words just hit you like a ton of bricks?  Words can hurt, a lot.  Think about how you use your words.  I am someone who is very direct, fluff words just aren’t my thing.  This can come off like a bee sting when I’m mad.  I have been told before that my words, when I’m angry, gave someone nightmares.  Nightmares!  Had they never said this I would have never even considered that my words could cut that deep.  To me, I had heard and felt worse so it wasn’t that bad.  What I failed to realize was that words hit me harder than they hit others.  Love languages work the opposite way too.  So when I would open my mouth in hurt, I was subconsciously looking to hurt that person back in the way the words hurt me originally.  The problem with that was, those words annihilated that person, and that was never my intention in the first place.

How do others receive your words?  Think about this literally.  Can you even answer it? Not unless you’ve asked.  I had asked several people I was close to how my words were perceived and I did not always like the feedback.  How many times does someone have to tell you that your words hurt, for you to believe them? Or do you just cut them off because they’re too sensitive anyway.  It’s okay to change something about yourself because it’s hurtful to someone else.  Often times we project how we’re feeling inside onto other people without even knowing it.  I always knew my words could hurt people, but it wasn’t until I was at my lowest point, that I saw the words slice right through someone.  What will be your wake-up call?

Everyday should be a step toward improvement.  If you don’t want to listen to someone’s unfavorable perception of you, or ignore it because they “don’t know you that well” then that’s completely your choice.  But, I am here to provide the questions, it’s your job to search within and find those answers.  Take a week and reflect on words.  I can assure you that you will see a big change in yourself once you reflect first and respond second.

“You never know how long your words will stay in someone’s mind even long after you’ve forgotten you spoke them”

Amaka

https://www.pinterest.com/explore/wise-man-quotes/, https://www.pinterest.com/pin/608056387159740377/, http://www.fggam.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/words.jpg